Explaining to Eric why slapping a Roomba on the back of a horse isn’t a good substitution for an actual jockey. Even it IS retro-fitted with a whip and a megaphone.

Why am I required to BUY something before a company will donate money to breast cancer? If they really cared enough about curing the disease then they wouldn’t force you to buy their…

• Keychains
• Baseball caps
• Tote bags
• Flip flops
• Ice cream scoops

…to “support the cause”. Instead, they’d take all the dollars they would otherwise spend manufacturing their craptastic tchotchkes, pair that money with a sizable chunk of change that they could EASILY afford to give, and send those funds straight to a reputable charity.

Not likely to happen, is it?

If they weren’t celebrities…

I know they don’t like gay people, but…

You notice they never show mixed couples in their ads, either? Every happy little pairing is perfectly (read: gratingly) homogeneous. White man + white woman. Black man + black woman. Asian man + asian woman. Because, Lord knows, the mixing of the races is the downfall of humanity.

Just me. Up late. Thinking too much.

I just landed a position at Yahoo!!!

I’m pretty excited to get started. To the point that when my soon-to-be-manager asked whether I’d rather take some time off between jobs, I almost turned him down. Then I realized I wasn’t an asshole.

But I must say that the Yahoo interview = HELL. At least the first hour of it.

There’s usually an initial discussion with a recruiter, followed at some point by a phone screen with the hiring manager. If you make it through that, there’s the in-person interview. Interviews always intimidate the hell outta me. But when it’s an ALL DAY meeting that includes an hour-long presentation of your work in front of half-a-dozen managers, recruiters and employees? Let’s just say I came *this* close to pulling a U-turn in the middle of the 101 and driving right back home. Fortunately everything turned out awesome: both groups I met with made me an offer by the end of the day (not quite sure I didn’t dream that part up, though).

But what confuses me the most about the entire scenario? The response I got from my current manager. I fully expected him to shoot daggers at me once I gave notice but instead he made me a rather flattering counter-offer: the possibility of moving up to MANAGEMENT.

Yeah. Me. A manager. Right.

Had me hopped up on visions of my own greatness for awhile…until a wise friend (who’s already done the manager thing) snapped me back to reality. Turns out that even though I’d have a more impressive title, my current employers couldn’t match Yahoo’s offer. So I’d essentially be taking on more responsibility and more work for less pay. And even though being a manager at my current job might look pretty sweet on a resume, the Yahoo name would stand out wayyyyy more to any future employers.

When you break it down that way, it’s kinda hard to be stupid.

So, after giving it major thought, I had to turn the counter-offer down. And from that moment on I got the silent treatment from my manager. Not a “How’s it going” in the hallway or a “Hello” as he passed my cube. In fact, he saw me no less than three times on my last day and still never said a word.

A-W-K-W-A-R-D.

Oh well, starting my new job on the 15th. Time to move on.